Learning Lines

Investigating New Territory Through The World of Writing

Butterfly Summer

At the beginning of this summer my family and I decided it was time to look for another faith community to fit our needs.  It was an extremely difficult decision for me.  For many years I have been wrestling with the lack of  female leadership in my church.  I’ve spent many hours justifying this.  I often look to Mary, for guidance, strength, courage, patience.  Growing up Catholic provided me a wealth of support I will carry forever.  I don’t think many people in the dominantly Christian Reform Community understand the idea of prayer to saints and Mary and the pope in addition to Christ as a Holy Trinity.  I believe my prayer life is richer within the context of being connected to so many spiritual souls I strive to emulate.

It took me a while to get my brain around the idea that leaving the Catholic Church did not mean leaving God.  This summer I have tried to integrate my prayer life much more into my daily life.  One thing I have been trying to do is appreciate God’s gifts through nature.  For some strange reason, this idea started to take hold specifically in my sighting of butterflies.

I try to walk or ride my bike to as many places as I can through the summer. I’m not even close to being as dedicated to it as my friend Laura.  She still has a baby trailer on the back.  She now has the ability to go many places with the luxury of bike with a trunk!  As I walked, jogged and rode around Bay View this past summer I spotted many butterflies.  Each sighting seemed a reminder that my spiritual struggle was not going unnoticed.

I suppose anyone could be a skeptic or consider these brief moments contrived.  Yet, instead I have used  these sightings of butterflies as opportunities.  They remind me how small I am.  These private moments help me feel protected.  The path of the butterfly is not straight.  When the wind pushes, it simply uses its ability to fly in a different way to get to its destination.

Change is not easy.  Staying where you feel the most comfortable is certainly the easiest thing to do.  Growth takes struggle, persistence, faith.  I hope I continue to grow in seeing my faith alive every day.

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One comment on “Butterfly Summer

  1. Mrs. Suburban
    August 13, 2010

    This was not cheesy at all – and it could have been. The most interesting observation is the way butterflies fly, especially when the wind blows. I really admire writers who can write about faith without sounding preachy or self-righteous, which you did. I mean, didn’t. You know what I mean. You did good, is what I mean.

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This entry was posted on August 13, 2010 by in Uncategorized.
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